bluesclues | WEEK ZERO: MINGLE

WEEK ZERO

OCCUPANCY: 36

For those of you counting along, you'll find that it's been three days since you've arrived at Master Blue's mansion. On this lovely Monday morning, the weak winter sun shines in through the spotless windows. The curtains in the ballroom have been drawn closed and cannot be moved away from the back wall during the daylight hours. The scent of a hot and delicious breakfast wafts from the direction of the dining hall at 7am, and small creaks and groans in the house urge you to awaken.

Perhaps you're a late riser though. No matter! There's still plenty of food you can make for yourself and ways for you to amuse yourself. Though the decor's been taken down, leftover Valentine's candy remains abundant, and a chilly breeze drifts through the halls. Best of all, all damage inflicted on the house has been repaired. In addition, a new placard has been mounted in the entryway.

As you carry on with your day in the mansion and explore the rooms provided, you may come to find that starting today it will appear as though you've all lost the use of one of your senses. Your vision may have grown dim, or maybe you really can't smell the enticing treats in the dining hall after all. How unfortunate.

Then again, something doesn't seem quite right. Walking through the halls, nothing seems terribly out of place. However, turning the corner or entering a room you will find someone who looks a little too much like yourself behaving in a fairly inappropriate manner. You would never read something so lewd. Who would ever think that you would wear something so pink? These mannerisms may seem innocent to others, but you can't help but disapprove.

Too bad no one else can see them.

Come Monday at noon, you will also find a new surprise. The wooden box with your name on it can now be opened, and a rustling crackle of static can be heard from overhead. Try as you might, you won't be able to find the speakers but this message will play loud and clear for all.

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Ah. Ah..............

See, the problem with being a stubborn Ass(c) and groping blindly for food anywhere, everywhere and all the way to every nook and cranny of the kitchen is that A. The kitchen in this damn McMansion is fucking humongous and Asch is going to be in there for a while, making a fool of himself, B. He, quite to his misfortune and the possible misfortune of everyone else has help in the form of! C. Some People Are Keeping Cockroach Snacks and D. Some People Cannot Fucking Find Anything, Especially Not A Single Thing They Left In The Kitchen.

So, here's Subete contributing his regular personal D(ose) of ridiculousness; Asch is much, much more likely to find something other than food in the fridge, or possibly on the counter. A nice hefty tome of the Hōjōki. Several hapless lemon leaves (no fruit, just the fucking leaves). A literal pillow. Three (3) billiard balls. Please do not cronch those.]

Eh? Hold-- Hold on, why are you looking at those like that? I didn't mean to leave them here, but it's temporary, I swear. At least, I'd like to think it's temporary, and-- Asch-san?

[He probably notices at some point that this isn't your average kitchen nightmare......]

[It's about when he picks up the billiard balls that something finally snaps.

He squeezes the ball, gritting his teeth in frustration at the shape of it. Balls. BALLS!! WHY!!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY DOING IN THE KITCHEN!!!!

WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!!!!!

Then he hears the voice.]

You.

[That fuckin' guy!!! It's said with no small amount of irritation.]

Did you put all of these things here.

[We would all like to know what the hap is fuckening but alas, the only people who might have that answer are busy making fashionably late entrances or being extremely cute but extremely unhelpful furries. You know how it is.

Subete will just. Give Asch and his balls a wide berth, looking between him and the billiard ball he's seemingly trying to crush... that's not how stress balls work.....]

Aha, yeah, it's me...

[He hasn't gotten yelled at too much so far for his disastrous lifestyle this week, which is probably a minor miracle by itself, so Subete figures he can take this on? He can probably take this on. Maybe.]

I don't think they're all mine, but -- sometimes I ended up leaving some things here, yeah. They're easier to find and-- [he cuts himself off and shakes his head; he still has no clue that Asch has no clue what he's doing, gestures-wise, so he's just been indicating whatever he's left around] Sorry if they're in the way. I really can't clean them up properly right now.

[Asch walks straight over to the trash, which he does seem to instantly know the location of

and dumps all the billiard balls into it.

then the book. the random fuckin LEAVES...]

There.

Eh? Ehhh?! Hang on, please, that's not where those go-- Plum-san is going to get mad and so is everyone else-- Hey--

[Of course Asch is going to know exactly where to take out the trash!!

And thusly! The trash takes itself out, or rather Subete goes skidding towards the trash can on reflex and starts trying to dig things out regardless of the possible danger of accosting his companion while he's in the middle of a tizzy. He'll dive for the book first of all -- that's the most important part. Most everything else can come later.....

Hopefully nobody has actually dumped food trash yet. F.]

You're definitely not losing your hearing so listen!

[He can't see it, but he can hear it. Stepping back, he stands a little away from the can, frowning at the sounds of the miserable man digging away.]

To what? Your plaintive, meaningless requests? Then listen to mine:

Clean up after yourself in here, or it gets thrown out.

I didn't really make any requests, just -- you shouldn't treat your hosts' things like that, no matter who they are, and you really shouldn't treat books like that--

[Subete seems to have rescued his precious book and the billiard balls in record time; they clack noisily as he rolls them hopefully into the sink and tries to figure out how to clean the trash residue off the book itself. Asch gets a bit of a respite while he focuses on that instead of too much moving around or protesting.

But eventually he's just standing there rather indignantly clutching all his things, which are pretty much just the book and his notebook. If he had free hands he'd probably be scribbling something rather unflattering, but...

Looks like they're at an impasse now.]

Even if I cleaned up after myself, it's not really realistic to carry everything around like this...

[He's probably just being stubborn at this point.]

Our host? You mean our kidnapper?

[the implication here is: who gives a sHIT]

So put it in a bag, and take it with you. How did you bring it here, if you can't carry it now?

Right, I guess at least one of the people -- the animal people? I don't know -- would be a kidnapper, but still... It's not the book's fault, or anything.

[It's not the billiard balls' faults either!! He's running water over them and patting them down with towels. ):

He's going to start looking for a bag... are there plastic bags here...... are their kidnappers also bad for the environment. Terrible.]

I wasn't meaning to bring them here, and I don't know where to put them if I take them with me. If I try to find a room I usually end up somewhere else. I don't know how I found the kitchen, either. [standing here with his armful of stuff] You haven't run into anything funny this week...?

No.

[HE'S LITERALLY BLIND BUT GO OFF?????]

Everyone here is already an idiot. What sort of "funny" thing are you talking about.

WEEK ZERO: MINGLE

2 dark 2 hell's kitchen

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